


Modern Family

by asiacore



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Dysfunctionally Functional Family, F/M, Genderswap, Kid Fic, M/M, Parenthood, always-a-girl!louis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-07
Updated: 2013-11-06
Packaged: 2017-12-17 23:49:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/873308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asiacore/pseuds/asiacore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis and Liam were a couple. Now they're not.<br/>She's straight. He's gay.<br/>But they still manage to co-parent under the same roof.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i'm really bad at summaries, oops. but the idea of this fic stemmed from an article i read in a magazine that accidentally got sent to my house a couple of months ago. i got the kids' names from my liam/louis fam on the sims. it's not rated for now because i have no clue what i'm going to write in the future but if things do get nsfw-ish i will change it as so. i'm going to try and update each chapter as i write it to keep the flow going rather than wait until i get multiple ones done and post them in bulk.
> 
> i have no beta and all mistakes are mine.
> 
> i hope you all enjoy it!

Everyone in the Tomlinson-Payne household has come to love when Friday nights roll around.

 

Louis especially because she doesn’t have to worry about what to make Liam cook for supper since they’ve long ago decided that Friday means takeaway. This Friday is Liam’s and as predicted he’s brought home a large pizza with extra pepperoni _for Caleb_  he says, but they all know it’s really for himself.

 

Too bad just this morning Taylor has decided to become a vegetarian after watching a film in her biology class about how badly animals in captivity are treated before being slaughtered and skinned, “So people like you dad can trick your family into munching on Piglet’s carcass!”

 

There’s no right or wrong thing to say in this situation and both Liam and Louis know that.

 

“Just pick the pepperoni off,” Caleb tells her, being ever the doting little brother he is. “I’ll eat them.”

 

“No!” the fifteen year old squeals. “It’s already been tainted. I can’t eat this.” She cocks her hip and puts her hand on it in a very Louis-like manner and looks to Liam like ‘ _what are you going to do about this?_ ’

 

Liam’s not even got his shoes off yet, he’s just sat down the pizza on the sitting room table and is about to shrug his jacket off but thinks better of it. “Well what would you like me to get you?” he asks and Louis nearly vaults over the table to get to him.

 

“Nonsense,” she says and pulls off his coat, wet from cold September rain. “There’s leftover salad in the refrigerator from supper a few nights ago, she can eat that.”

 

“But mum-” Taylor starts to whine but Louis shoots her a warning glance that Liam still hasn’t been able to muster himself and quietly trudges into the kitchen.

 

Louis goes to hang his coat like she’s always done before they were married and after the divorce and Liam thanks her just as always with a kiss on each cheek. “How was work?” she asks and he just answers with a shrug.

 

“Where’s Pais?” he’s already halfway up the steps while asking but Louis answers anyway. “I told her to wash up before you got here, but who knows what she’s gotten up to up there.”

 

He finds her laying belly down on the floor in what was once her and Taylor’s shared room until Liam moved down into the basement and they renovated his old office into a new room for Taylor after she declared it unfair that Caleb who was nine got his own room and she didn’t.

 

“Paisley?” Liam calls out with a knock on the open door but she doesn’t hear him. She’s too busy typing away at her laptop with her earbuds wedged in deep, blasting something top 40’s-ish from what he can tell. He moves until he’s stood in front of her and she stares up at him big brown eyes that reflect his own.

 

“Daddy!” she exclaims, hops up and throws herself full force at him into a hug. “I didn’t know you were home yet.”

 

“Yeah well you wouldn’t know if the house was burning down what with how loud your music was.” he says and only feels a little bad when she turns away and wriggles out of his grasp. Out of the three of his kids she is admittedly daddy’s little girl, even at twelve,  but he has scolded her about that multiple times, after all.

 

“Sorry,” she says bottom lip going wobbly and he pulls her into a hug, he wasn’t even that upset to begin with.

 

“It’s alright,” he pushes the fringe out of Paisley’s eyes. “I’ve got supper and everyone’s waiting come on.”

 

-

 

Another great thing about Fridays is the fact that they don’t have to fight the kids to get them in bed at a decent hour so it won’t be like pulling teeth to get them up for school the next day.

 

They all sit together and watch an animated film they’ve seen probably a dozen times before but it was Caleb’s night to pick and this is the closest he’s getting to explosions and gorish deaths until he’s 30 according to Louis.

 

It’s around midnight when they finally put the kids to bed, Paisley having already fallen asleep in her father’s lap while Louis sees to it that Caleb brushes his teeth properly.

 

After the kids are tucked in and in Taylor’s case left to her own devices, Louis and Liam settle back down on their trusty old well lived in couch and unwind over a bottle of wine. They sit and talk about the past, about how they met through a mutual friend, Niall (who Liam still needs to text back about hanging out this weekend), back when they were in school.

 

Liam talks about how Louis was and still is the most beautiful girl, or rather woman now, that he’s ever laid his eyes on despite their situation and  Louis talks about how she came for the rippling muscles and rumors of a big dick but stayed for his boyish charm (and well he has a pretty big dick so-).

 

They talk about their engagement. How Liam got down on one knee right there after graduation in front of everyone and asked Louis to marry him. How not even a year later Louis’ pregnant with Taylor. How three years after that when they were expecting their second child, Paisley, Liam dropped a metaphorical blue spiny shell.

 

“You had started seeing that guy from work, whatsit-” Louis says, lips loose from her third glass of wine, but she’s not too bothered. “Doug? Dean? Dan?”

 

“It was Aiden,” Liam tells her. She always thinks its something beginning with a D. “His name was Aiden and I never questioned my sexuality until I met that man.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, big brown eyes with a smile to boot.” Louis grins while replenishing her glass. “How can I blame you? He sounds quite fit.”

 

“That doesn’t excuse anything.” Liam frowns and he always gets a little pouty when he’s tipsy so Louis takes his glass and sets it out of reach on the end table behind her. “I had a very pregnant wife at home meanwhile I was caught up in... whatever that was-”

 

“Dating,” she provides and he nods glumly.

 

“Right, that and not only was I cheating on you, but I was cheating with another man.” he blinks back tears and since Louis has made peace with the past she can bring herself to lean forward and wrap him up in a hug.

 

“Sshhh,” she coos, like she’s talking to one of their children. “It’s alright, we’re alright. The kids are alright.”

 

Louis’ always had her way with Liam and probably always will if its up to either of them. She’d somehow roped him back in after the initial blow out from his Big Gay revelation. The one where she packed his bags set them on the porch with a note telling him to never call. When she wouldn’t let him see the girls, even after they’d gone through the trouble to set up court appointed meetings.

 

It took Niall of all people to set Louis straight. He’d reminded her how hard it was for her growing up without a father after he flaked when she was young. So they’d tried to work things out. They even ended up having Caleb in the process but it just... wasn’t the same.

 

Liam couldn’t live without Louis though, still can’t, and she without him. Their relationship has been twenty years in the making and there’s no going back from that. So here they are under the same roof. Albeit after years of therapy and several shouting matches that only Taylor is old enough to remember.

 

It’s nearly half two when Louis speaks up. “Come on then, time for us old farts to get to bed.”

 

“Already?” Liam teases, it’s watery but banter has always been their thing. “You getting soft on me, Lou?”

 

“Only in your wildest fantasies,” she stands and brushes the lint off her pajama bottoms. “I actually have to be up early, I’ve got a date.”

 

“A date?” Liam blanches.

 

“Yes, a _date_ ,” Louis repeats. “Brunch with a bloke I met a couple of weeks ago.” She lends an arm out to help pull Liam up.

 

Liam grabs her hand and staggers up into a stand. “Does he know about-”

 

“About us? Liam, really?” she quips. “I’ve not had a guy ask me out in over two years. No one wants to date the chick who still lives with her ex. Of course I haven’t told him yet.”

 

“Well do you plan on it?” Liam frowns. “Do the kids know?”

 

“What is with the 21 questions, Liam? For God’s sake, go to bed.” Louis ushers him over to the basement stairs and goes about flicking off lights and downs the rest of Liam’s glass before setting them both in the sink. “Go on then,” she says when she sees him standing there watching her. “We’ll talk about this tomor- well, later.”

 

“Will we really?”

 

“Yes of course,” she gets up on her toes and presses a kiss to his forehead. “Get some sleep now though, you look wrecked.”

 

“Goodnight Lou,” Liam says and it almost feels like how things used to be. Like he’s about to climb up the stairs behind her and roll into bed beside her, but it’s not and he doesn’t.

 

Instead Louis bids him off with a final, “Night Li,” and flicks off the last light when she gets to the top off the stairs while descends down his own and flops down right on top of sheets face first with a heavy sigh.

 

Tomorrow is going to be a long day.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His name is Harry but she keeps calling him Liam by accident, or maybe force of habit. It’s just that... he’s got this curly brown hair that reminds her of Liam after she’d convinced him back in school that waking up at half six every morning to flat iron his hair wasn’t really worth it. And she can’t help that she keeps comparing him to Liam. He’s all she knows. Liam was her first and only love and she’s not one for semantics, but that’s kind of a big deal.

“I don’t know,” Niall says over a plate of french toast that once upon a time had Liam’s name on it. “I think this may be a good idea.”

 

Liam snorts. “What? You inviting yourself over and eating me out of house and home?”

 

“No, Louis dating again.” he replies very seriously before flicking a syrupy piece of toast at Liam’s head. “Besides I’m not here for your mediocre cooking, I’m here to see my favorite nieces and nephew.”

 

“They’re not actually related to you, just so you know.” Liam grumbles and tries to scrape soggy food off of his favorite night shirt.

 

“No need to get hostile.” Niall holds his hand up in faux surrender. Liam knows he’d never give in that easily. “It’s not my fault your baby mama is seeing another man-”

 

Liam’s eyes nearly fall right out of his head. “My _what_? Niall please. You’ve got to stop watching those American sitcoms.”

 

“Lucky for you though,” Niall continues as if he was not interrupted. “I know a guy.”

 

“Yeah I know a guy too, several guys actual-”

 

“And he’s gay.”

 

“Are you trying to set me up Niall?” Liam gawks. “With some random bloke you know just because he’s gay? What makes you think I’m even interested?”

 

“Everyone’s interested in him. Trust me.” Niall winks. “He’s fucking beautiful mate.”

 

“Sounds like you want him.” Liam says, only half joking. He was there for what might have been Niall’s bi-curious phase back in Uni, but who's to say that has passed. “Why don’t you go for it yourself?”

 

Niall looks as if he’s briefly considering it but shakes his head instead. “Nah, he’s all yours.”

 

“What makes you think he’d be into me?” Liam bites at his bottom lip the way Louis would scold him for when they were together.

 

“Who wouldn’t Liam, you’re a catch.” Niall says genuinely with a smile that only years of braces could produce.

 

Liam rolls his eyes and takes the dirty dishes from the table over to the sink to hide his blush. “So what’s his name?”

 

“Zayn, his name is Zayn.” Niall hops up and claps a hand on his shoulder. “And I really think you’re going to like him.”

 

-

 

Louis’ date is going terribly.

 

His name is Harry but she keeps calling him Liam by accident, or maybe force of habit. It’s just that... he’s got this curly brown hair that reminds her of Liam after she’d convinced him back in school that waking up at half six every morning to flat iron his hair wasn’t really worth it.

 

And she can’t help that she keeps comparing him to Liam. He’s all she knows. Liam was her first and only love and she’s not one for semantics, but that’s kind of a big deal.

 

“I’m sorry,” she drops her fork with a loud clatter and breaks him off mid-drawl about his cat named... _whatever_ she doesn’t know what it is, she wasn’t listening. “I can’t do this.”

 

“Something the matter?” Harry asks his forehead wrinkling (‘like Liam’ she notes) with a frown.

 

“You’re just,” Louis huffs, “you remind me so much of my ex.”

 

“Liam?” he supplies and she freezes.

 

“Yeah, how did you know that?”

 

Harry laughs and its more like a bark, really. Somewhere between Niall when he’s drunk and an actual dog. “You’ve been calling me by his name all morning,” he looks down at his fancy wrist watch that Louis eyes curiously. “Actually its half past two now. So all afternoon really.”

 

“Oh my is it really that late?” Louis pushes away her ham and basil omelette that she’d played with and picked at the way she’d taught Taylor not to instead of actually eating it. “I’ve got to get home, the kids-”

 

“You’ve got kids?” Harry raises an eyebrow, or at least tries to at least. They both go up and do a perfect type of arch that Louis would be jealous of if she wasn’t about to run out on this guy.

 

“Er- yeah,” Louis grits out. Oops this isn’t the way she wanted to do this. It doesn’t matter now anyway because she’s royally fucked up this date anyway. “I’ve got three that look nothing like me.”

 

Harry grins. “Spitting image of their father, then?”

 

Louis nods, “Liam’s got some strong genes.”

 

“Well if you’ve got children to tend to I guess I’ve got no choice but to let you go.” Harry says but wraps a big hand around Louis’ forearm when she goes to wave for the check. “But I’d like to do this again sometime.”

 

“I- what?” Louis blubbers out because this has never happened to her before. All the times she’s told guys about her kids _three kids_ they’ve bolted before she could even tell them about her awkward living situation which, “I live with Liam.”

 

Harry blinks. It feels like time has slowed down and Louis watches him with bated breath. Louis braces herself for the impending blow up and is almost disappointed when it never comes. “Okay,” is all he says with a curt nod.

 

He waves his hand their waitress appears with the check. Louis grabs it first and is about to ask for her to split it when Harry plucks it from in between her fingers.

 

“Um, okay?” she says for the lack of a better thing to say.

 

“Okay.” Harry says again with a nod this time as he whips out a card and hands it to their waitress.

 

Louis sips at her water because her throats dry and Harry is staring at her. He doesn’t let up until the check is back and even then only looks away for a millisecond to sign the receipt with a flourish before setting his unrelenting gaze back upon her.

 

“So,” he says, “when can I see you again?”

 

-

 

Louis bursts through the front door with a squeal and doesn’t even bother shutting the front door before falling face first onto the couch. “Where are my children?” she shouts but its muffled into the cushion.

 

Liam appears from within the kitchen with a dish towel slung over one shoulder. “Football practice on Saturdays you know that,”  he says before closing the door and sitting down beside Louis.  “What’s all this for?” he asks and moves her head so its in his lap.

 

She peeks one eye open and sighs. “Harry wants to go on another date with me?” It’s a question because she’s still not sure if it actually happened or not.

 

“Harry,” Liam tests the name out and hums noncommittally. “He’s nice, then?”

 

“The nicest,” Louis beams, “besides you of course. He just- I told him about the kids and you- not that you’re gay but that we still live together even though we’re not together and he didn’t even mind he just said okay and now he wants to see me again and-”

 

“Whoa okay Lou, slow down.” Liam stops her with a hand on her back. “You sound like Pais when she gets into the sweets jar.”

 

“I know, I’m just,” Louis rolls over onto her back. “I’m so happy.” She takes Liam’s hand that’s hovering up above where it was just laying on her back and pulls it down to her stomach. He instantaneously rubs at it like he did all three times she was pregnant as they fall into a comfortable silence.

 

Liam’s always been pretty good at reading Louis. She’s beyond guarded, probably always will be but there are cracks and ticks that only twenty years of practice can allow him to see through and right now he sees none. She’s genuinely happy. Like the only kind of happy she got when she’d go back home and visit her mum and little sisters back when they were in Uni. The kind of happy when she got when she’d beat Liam at what was supposed to be just a pickup match.

 

He wants to tell her that he’s happy that she’s happy. It’s been along time since she’s looked like this and he can’t help but feel like a lot of that is his fault. So he wants to say something, anything, really but he doesn’t. He can’t. Instead Liam tries to count the seconds in between but stops somewhere after 240 because he was never any good at math and Louis’ prodding at his thigh with her free hand.

 

“It’s really nice, you should try it.” Louis tells him.

 

Liam blinks out of whatever reverie he was caught in. “What? Dating?”

 

“Being happy,” she pokes at him again, “but if dating makes you happy then yes.”

 

“Niall knows a guy,” Liam shifts and jostles Louis enough that she sits up. “His name is Zayn and he thinks I’ll like him.”

 

Louis nods. “That’s good.”

 

“What’s going to happen with us?” Liam doesn’t want to ask but he _has_ to. “I mean what if you want to get remarried? What happens then?”

 

“Liam please, you’re always doing that. Jumping ahead and overthinking things. We’ll figure that when it gets here, if it ever does. Just know that I’d never leave you.”

 

“Except that time you kicked me out.”

 

“Details,” she waves him away and makes to stand. “I suppose I ought to be off to pick up our little rascals then.”

 

“Right and I’m just about done here.” Liam stands as well and gestures toward the kitchen. “Supper should be ready when you get back.”

 

“Ah you’re the perfect housewife.” Louis coos. “You sure you don’t want to try and work this out again if things go south with Harry?”

 

“Go on then get.” Liam flings his dish towel at Louis but she easily dodges it and it falls to the floor. “And take Caleb’s inhaler will you? He’s left it in the key bowl again.”

 

“On it.” Louis salutes and turns for the door. “By the way,” she pops her head in the kitchen door. “I meant what I said about never leaving you and all that.”

  
“I know,” he says over a boiling pot of something delicious smelling that kicks Louis in hyperdrive. Liam replies a beat late, once he hears the front door slam shut and the ignition in that ridiculous minivan Louis insisted they buy turns over. “I’d never leave you either.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a feeling low in his belly hot and tight. A kind of thing he hasn’t felt in years since he was young and still in school trying to win over Louis. He thinks maybe Zayn feels it too, if the way he’s looking at him is anything to go by.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long to post i've not been home for a while

“I can’t do it!” Liam wails and throws his dishrag into the sink. “I’m going to have to call Niall and tell him to cancel, I can’t go on this date.”

 

“And I thought I was the melodramatic one,” Louis says from inside the cup cabinet. They’re meant to be doing the washing but she’s willing to take a break if Liam is.

 

Liam slumps down into a chair and thunks his head on the kitchen table. “I’m pathetic, aren’t I?”

 

“I know its not pity you’re after here so I’m not even going to bother with sympathizing.” She grabs a chair and pulls it close next to him. “You and I both know this is long overdue and if Niall finds him suitable for you then I say you go for it. He was the one who brought us together, after all.”

 

“Yeah and look how we ended up.” Liam mumbles into the wood.

 

“Still attached at the hip twenty years later so shut up.” Louis flicks at his ear until he looks up. “It’s going to be fine, Li. Just don’t overthink it. I was freaking out about my date with Harry but it ended really well.”

 

“You’ve had practice though, you dated when we were you know...” _separated_ he can’t say, “but I’ve not been on a date since _you_.” Liam knows he’s whining but its true. What he and Aiden had was, well it was an affair. Sure they’d gone out a few times but it was always covert. They were always sneaking around.

 

Louis scooches forward, moves her hand from his ear to the back of his neck, and scritches at the hairs there like she always does for Caleb when he comes home upset about something that had happened earlier at school.

 

“I just don’t want to be shit at this.” Liam says a while later. “This is all so new to me.”

“I know babe,” she nods. “I’ve gone and spoiled you and now you have no idea what to do.”

 

Maybe being together for so long wasn’t such a good idea, looking back on it. But they were in it for the long haul when this all began. Who knew they’d end up divorced but still together at 36 and 35 respectively. (Louis thinks if she had known she probably wouldn’t have changed a thing but it’d have been nice to have a warning _please_.)

 

“You’re just going to have to re-learn how to date.” Louis tells him. “I know you’ve been off the market for a while but its either that or the second option which is stay alone forever until a) you die or b) your right hand falls off.”

 

“Way to be reassuring.” Liam deadpans but takes her words into consideration.

 

“Yeah, yeah, well. You just go to bed and I’ll finish up in here. I don’t you slicing open your hand or anything from your carelessness or whatever.”

 

“That was one time and it was just my finger.”

 

Louis rolls her eyes and places her hands at the tops of his shoulders leading him out of the kitchen. “Go wank or something you’re extremely tense.”

 

Liam’s eyes go wide like she’s not ever seen touched or tasted his dick before and Louis just cackles before turning on her heel and heading back into the kitchen.

 

-

 

Liam’s on his seventh outfit change when the doorbell rings.

 

There are sounds of multiple feet rushing around above him and a distinct shout of, “I’ve got it!” from Taylor. He decides that what he’s got on is going to have to be fine, just a navy button up and some jeans and figures his hair is still short enough that he can get away with not doing anything to it.

 

He quickly shuffles up the stairs but is cornered by Louis as soon as he reaches the main floor.

 

“You brought him _here_?” she hisses and pokes a finger at his chest.

 

Liam is tentative when he answers. “Uh, yes?”

 

“What are we going to tell the kids?” Louis prods. “Oh my god Liam, how could you?”

 

“Just tell them that I’m going on a date?” he slides away from the wall and Louis’ disapproving glare.

 

“You’re like, so fit.” Taylor says and both Louis and Liam rush over to stop her.

 

Liam gets his first glimpse of his date and wow. He owes Niall a full brekkie for this.

 

“Stop harassing him,” Louis says and pulls Taylor back from where she’s making heart eyes at a man who has got to be at least ten years her junior. Paisley and Caleb fall back behind Liam and attach themselves each to a leg.

 

“It’s no problem, I love kids. Grew up with a big family so I guess I have no choice, yeah? My name’s Zayn by the way, you must be Louis,” he turns his head and smiles, “and this pretty girl must be Taylor.”

 

“Yes, I am. How do you know that?” Louis says and steps protectively in front of Taylor.

 

“Niall told me.” Zayn shrugs. “Gave me the whole run down beforehand.”

 

“Mum are you dating him?” Taylor peeks her head around to ask.

 

“No,” Liam says, raises his hand a little like he’s back in primary and instantly feels like a prat. “I am.”

 

Taylor shrieks. “No way!”

 

Caleb gasps and tugs on the leg of Liam’s jeans. “I thought you were dating mummy?”

 

“No you idiot they haven’t even slept in the same room in years.” Taylor whips her head around and scowls.

 

“Taylor!” Louis warns.

 

“Ugh!” Taylor groans and stomps up the steps. “It’s so not fair dad’s allowed to date really hot guys and he’s _old_ , but I’m not?” She mumbles something else inaudible and slams her bedroom door shut.

 

“And that’s why you’re not dating until you’re 30,” Liam turns and affectionately pets Paisley on the head. “I’ve got to go now, bean, hop off.” he says but Paisley doesn’t budge.

 

Caleb’s moved on to Louis and has taken to tugging at her shirt now, nearly in tears.

 

“I’ll handle this one,” she says and picks Caleb up and places him on her hip. He’s nine years old now and she thinks shouldn’t need this kind of coddling, even stops Liam when he tried to, but he’s just so sensitive and Taylor knows that Caleb is too young to even comprehend what’s going on right now. She truly is a terror sometimes.

 

“Paisley come on now you father has somewhere to be.” Louis tries to reason with her but when it comes to Liam and his younger daughter there really is no use getting involved. He’ll handle it, she shrugs and sends Liam an apathetic look before taking their sniffling son up to his room.

 

Paisley blinks up at Liam and doesn’t say anything but juts her bottom lip out in a silent plea. Liam gets down on bended knee and gently knocks their foreheads together. “I’ll be back soon, yeah? You’ll stay here and hold the fort down for me won’t you? Make sure mum doesn’t burn the house down while I’m gone.”

 

“Paisley, is it?” Zayn asks from where he’s now stood next to Liam and she nods. “I promise I’ll bring him back before you even realize he’s gone.” He drags his fingers across his chest. “Cross my heart.”

 

“Don’t hope to die,” she says and Zayn chuckles.

 

“Never that,” he says. “I wouldn’t be able to take your dad out again then, I reckon.”

 

“If you’d even want to,” Liam finally stands and extends his arm. “Nice to finally meet you.”

 

“Same to you,” Zayn says and shakes his head. “You too Paisley.”

 

She goes red and Liam can tell he’s already got competition for favorite guy in her eyes. “Alright, go and make sure Taylor’s not upset for me. I’ll call to check in soon.” Liam tells his daughter with a kiss on her forehead while he cards his fingers through her long brown hair .

 

He turns to grab his coat and follow Zayn out when Paisley trollops up the steps and is heard banging on her sisters door.

 

“Sorry about that,” Liam tells Zayn as they head to his car. “I’d love to tell you things aren’t always like that around here, but they usually are.”

 

“I appreciate the honesty,” Zayn says and moves to open the door for Liam who thanks him in return. “I know what its like.”

 

Liam nods and his eyebrows shoot up to his head in realization. “You’ve got kids then?”

 

“Not of my own, no.” Zayn shakes his head. “I can’t really have kids, you know? I’ve got tons of nieces and nephews though so it feels like I do sometimes.”

 

Liam looks over at him as they drive to wherever Zayn’s picked for them to go. The sun is going down and there are streaks of orange and pink and purple and blue painting Zayn’s face different colors and this is Liam’s first time properly looking at him since his open ogling back at the house and to put it lightly he’s stunned. This guy is a total catch and its a wonder how he’s even single to begin with. It’s a shame he can’t have kids because Liam’s sure his offspring would be nothing short of gorgeous.

 

He must’ve said as much because they’re at a stop and Zayn is staring right at him. “Shit, did I say that out loud?”

 

“Say what out loud?” Zayn smirks and Liam’s not taking the bait. Almost does but he knows this trick Louis’ conditioned him well.

 

“Nothing,” Liam says and turns away, breaks the trance and tells himself not to look back. “Where are we off to, then?” he asks the window.

 

“I’m not really the dinner and a movie type of guy,” Zayn tells him. “But I’m also not the type who peaks early so you’ll just have to wait and see.” He winks and Liam tries to act like he’s not staring at him through the corner of his eye. But he’s got a terrible poker face and lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding when Zayn reaches over and puts a hand on his leg. “Is this okay?”

 

“Yeah,” Liam eyes his hand and nods. He puts his hand over Zayn’s, slots their fingers between one another and grins when he looks up to see Zayn’s face lit up and is already overwhelmed with the urge to kiss him.

 

There’s a feeling low in his belly hot and tight. A kind of thing he hasn’t felt in years since he was young and still in school trying to win over Louis. He thinks maybe Zayn feels it too, if the way he’s looking at him is anything to go by. It’s a little early though, they’ve known each other a whopping half hour and Zayn’s already mentioned a second date and Liam’s already got something akin to butterflies.

 

A car horn beeps loud behind them and they both jump as they’re startled out of reverie. Liam frowns for no reason at all and Zayn pats him on the leg reassuringly. “Don’t worry,” he says with both eyes on the road as he takes off. “We’ll have enough time for that later.”

  
And Liam wonders when his life turned into an Usher song because he’s got it bad.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zayn makes a big show of zipping his lips and throwing away the key and Liam turns back to his lane. He knocks down eight pins this time but Zayn calling him daddy keeps replaying in his head and he knows he’s fucked for the rest of this game. After Zayn takes his turn and knocks down three pins Liam mentions nourishment and they abandon the game in search of food. Liam’s won three games in a row already anyway and Zayn shimmying and shaking his butt every time he actually hits a pin is starting to get to him.

Zayn is awfully calm to be losing as bad as he is.

 

It’s their third game and he has an impressive record of 0 for 3 which Liam had an initial hunch that Zayn was letting him win, but soon realized that Zayn’s just a shit bowler.

 

“You’re no good at this, quiffy,” Liam teases when Zayn comes back from two major gutter balls. A little girl who is at the lane next to theirs with a group of children presumably there for birthday party giggles as she whispers in another little girls’ ear and points at Zayn’s score.

 

“Don’t make me regret letting you pick my name,” Zayn sits down next to him as the pins reset and Liam stands.

 

“It was either quiffy or sunshine and I figured that more appropriate for Niall.” Liam grabs the bright green bowling ball and sticks his tongue out at Zayn. “Besides anything is better than the name you chose for me.”

 

“You can say it you know,” Zayn grins. “I bet your kids say it all the time.”

 

“Yeah that’s because they’re my kids!” Liam shrieks and shuffles over to the lane. He lines up his shot and pulls back the ball but right before he can release it Zayn shouts at what must be the top of his lungs.

 

“ _DADDY!_ ”

 

The ball wobbles a little and slips off his fingers right into the gutter and Liam goes impossibly red as he skulks back to the ball return where Zayn is stood looking very much like that cat who got the cream.

 

The little girls in the lane next to them are giggling again and Liam pokes Zayn in the chest. “That’s cheating you know? I need a do over are there do overs in bowling?”

 

Zayn laughs, “Nah, mate but I can put up the bumpers for ya if you’d like.”

 

“Ha ha,” Liam says unamused and snatches his ball when its spat out of the machine.

 

“You got this daddy!” Zayn says as Liam heads back up to the lane and he nearly trips over himself.

 

“Hey,” Liam turns and narrows his eyes like he would at his kids. Goes for a tone that would make Caleb eat his vegetables without putting up a fuss. “None of that.”

 

Zayn makes a big show of zipping his lips and throwing away the key and Liam turns back to his lane. He knocks down eight pins this time but Zayn calling him daddy keeps replaying in his head and he knows he’s fucked for the rest of this game.

 

After Zayn takes his turn and knocks down three pins Liam mentions nourishment and they abandon the game in search of food. Liam’s won three games in a row already anyway and Zayn shimmying and shaking his butt every time he actually hits a pin is starting to get to him.

 

They end up at quaint little Italian place that serves giant slices of pizza and they split one.

 

Liam takes one bite and swoons. Pizza is his weakness. He hums and takes another bite and thinks if the world were ending and he had to choose between a good slice of pizza like this one or saving Niall he’d at least feel bad while he ate his last slice (and if he’d made it through the apocalypse he’d hold a food themed funeral service for Niall and bring pizza to his grave every day because he’s a _good friend,_ okay).

 

He looks up and Zayn is staring at him all weird and that’s...weird. “What?” Liam asks and looks around to make sure no one else is staring too. “Is there something on my face?”

 

“You were like proper moaning into that slice a second ago.” Zayn says amusedly a smile quirked at the edge of his lips.

 

“Oh,” Liam’s eyes go wide and he feels hot all over. “Pizza is my kryptonite.” He says as if its the most obviously thing ever.

 

“Your kryptonite?” Zayn’s eyebrows shoot up. “I didn’t know I was dating Superman.”

 

“Shh,” Liam slaps a palm over Zayn’s mouth, “you’ll give away my secret identity.” Zayn licks his palm and Liam pulls away and wipes his hands on his jeans. “Gross.”

 

“Shouldn’t you be wearing glasses or something?” Zayn takes a bite of his own pizza. “Have you got your suit on underneath?”

 

“Nah, that’s all been done before, innit?” Liam shakes his head. “I’m trying the whole hiding in plain sight approach, people will never know what hit ‘em.”

 

“Sounds sinister,” Zayn comments and Liam frowns.

 

“That’s the opposite of what its supposed to be. But now that you know who I really am, I’m going to have to kill you.” Liam says very seriously.

 

“Seems a bit extreme to me,” Zayn shrugs and sets his pizza down as if his existence has not just been threatened. “I could be your ally, you know?”

 

“Hmm,” Liam considers, “you can be Lana.”

 

Zayn scrunches up his nose. “Lana Lang? I was thinking someone more... relevant.”

 

“Alright quiffy,” Liam steals a pepperoni from Zayn. “I guess you can be Batman.”

 

Zayn lets out a celebratory whop and pumps his fist in the air. “World’s finest,” he says and holds his hand up for a high five. Liam claps it and is surprised when Zayn interlocks their fingers and lowers their hands back down onto the table. “We make a great pair, I’ll say.”

 

Liam doesn’t know if they’re still talking about superheroes or if they’re talking about them so he just nods. “Yeah,” he agrees because they do.

 

And honestly that terrifies him.

 

-

 

“He said we make a great pair,” Liam tells Louis once he’s back home and has helped put Paisley and Caleb to bed. “It was awful Lou, I nearly fainted in the middle of the restaurant.”

 

“Do you not like him?” Louis asks between brushing her teeth. “He was like proper fit from what I remember.” She waves her toothbrush around. “Even Taylor was trying to have a go at him and she’s like half his age.”

 

Liam flops back onto what used to be his and Louis’ bed. “That’s the problem. I like him so much. When we got back we snogged in the car for like fifteen minutes and then again when we were at the doorstep. We were out there like teenagers, I don’t even think you and I acted like that.”

 

“I don’t see what the problem is?” Louis goes back into the adjoining bathroom to spit and comes back with a clean mouth swaddled in a big robe that Liam got her for for their very first anniversary. It says Mrs. Payne on the back and he has a matching one downstairs hanging on the back of his door.

 

“He’s perfect Louis,” he sits up on his elbows. “Zayn reminds me so much of you, he’s like you with a ding dong.”

 

“Thank you?” Louis crawls up next to him and ties her hair up in a bun. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

 

“I just...” Liam’s quiet for a while before speaking again. “I really like him, like a lot.”

 

“That’s good, that’s great actually, Li.” She scratches a hand through the short hairs at the top of his head and pulls him in for a cuddle. “You deserve to be happy. We both do.”

 

“Yeah,” Liam agrees. “Are you? Happy, I mean. I know you said you were the other day but, are you happy right now?”

 

Louis hums. “It’s a work in progress but, I’m getting there.”

 

“This is big for us Lou,” Liam starts but Louis shushes him.

 

“Shh, time for bed.” She says. “Early day tomorrow, school and all.”

 

“Right, I’ll just,” Liam goes to shake out of Louis’ grasp when she tightens it.

 

“No, stay.” Louis mumbles.

 

Liam protests. “But Lou-”

 

“Just tonight,” she argues, “last time. For old times’ sake.”

 

“Alright, but lemme up for a sec.” Liam stands and shimmies out of his jeans and top. He climbs back in bed just in his pants and thinks about how suspect they would look if one of their children were to walk in right now and see Louis with her hand on his chest and his arm wrapped delicately around her.

  
But then he thinks, _fuck it,_ and goes to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m off now,” Louis heads into the coat closet to grab her bag and snatches her coat off the rack. “I’ll be back before midnight make sure Caleb takes his medicine” she tells Liam and tells Taylor, “and don’t forget to floss. Try not to stay up late it is a school night after all.”
> 
> When the door slams shut Liam turns to Zayn with the worlds saddest looking frown on his face. “Sorry about all this,” he gestures to the surprisingly quiet house. “I was really looking forward to going out with you again.”

Louis and Liam have always had communication issues. She reckons its time they change that, Liam’s even tried to sit her down and talk things out because he’s the clerical, boring type but they’re just too good at reading each other’s emotions and rely heavily on that, even when Louis puts her walls up and Liam deflects.

 

Which is why nights like tonight happen.

 

“What are you getting all dressed up for?” Liam asks Louis as he barges into her room, unannounced, might she add. What if she had been naked? Not that she’s got any bits he’s not seen yet, but its the principle.

 

“Not that its any of your business but I’ve got a date tonight.” Louis slides her black dress over her slip. “But since you’re here zip me up, will you?”

 

Liam doesn’t move his hands still hanging limp in the air with a tie in each. He’d originally came in there for help choosing (and also help doing it up because he’s not quite got it down and at 35 it's only mildly embarrassing). Louis scoffs, she pushes past him out into the hall towards Taylor’s room. Maybe she will help her mother because she’s kind and not a knobhead and takes after her mother obviously.

 

“Wait,” Liam stops Louis with a hand to her wrist.

 

“What?” she snips, turns around and stops. “Wait, why are you all dressed up as well?”

 

“Seems like we’ve both got dates tonight.” Liam frowns.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me you’ve got a date planned for tonight?” Louis throws her hands up in the air in accusation.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me you’ve got a date tonight?” Liam counters and the door to Taylor’s room nearly flies off its hinges as she stomps out.

 

“Why are you two shouting at each other in front of my room?” she looks inherently bored, a trait of Louis’ that she’s acquired although neither of them are willing to admit it.

 

“We are not shouting.” Liam says at the same time Louis says, “Go back in your room.”

 

The doorbell rings and Louis rolls her eyes. “Why do you always bring him here?” she turns to Taylor. “Will you please zip my dress I’m stood here with my bum out and a stranger is downstairs.”

 

“He’s not a stranger,” Liam says, “you’ve met him before.”

 

“I do not know the man, do I? Either way, you’ve got to cancel I’m to be meeting Harry soon and we don’t have time for a debate.” Louis thanks Taylor with a kiss to the cheek before walking back into her room. “Now where did I put those red heels?”

 

“Wait what do you mean I’ve got to cancel?” Liam follows her as the doorbell rings again. “Zayn’s already here and you’ve not even left yet."

 

“Zayn?” Taylor pops her head in the door. “I’ve got it!” She scurries down the stairs.

 

“Taylor!” Louis and Liam both shout but she’s already gone.

 

Louis shoves on her shoes before pushing past Liam again out the door and rushes down the steps with him hot on her heels, ties forgotten in her bedroom.

 

“Louis,” Zayn looks up from where Taylor is trying her best to win him over with her heart eyes. “You look amazing, you too Liam.”

 

“Hello Zayn,” Louis preens, flips her hair over her shoulder and plasters a smile on her face while Liam mumbles a weak, “thanks”.

 

“Are you ready then?” he asks and Louis cuts in before Liam can answer.

 

“Actually I’m going out tonight so he’s going to have to cancel, so sorry, overlapping schedules and all that.”

 

“What? No!” Taylor turns to Louis. “You both can go! I can watch Pais and Caleb. I’m practically sixteen mum.”

 

“Absolutely not.” Louis says and that’s final. “I’m off now,” she heads into the coat closet to grab her bag and snatches her coat off the rack. “I’ll be back before midnight make sure Caleb takes his medicine” she tells Liam and tells Taylor, “and don’t forget to floss. Try not to stay up late it is a school night after all.”

 

When the door slams shut Liam turns to Zayn with the worlds saddest looking frown on his face. “Sorry about all this,” he gestures to the surprisingly quiet house. “I was really looking forward to going out with you again.”

 

“Why don’t you then?” Taylor asks with her hands on her hips, mouth set in determination.

 

“You heard your mum you’re hardly old enough to be-”

 

“No dad, like, here,” she moves her hands in the same gesture he just did. “I mean you two just stay here! You don’t have to go out to be on a date, you know?”

 

“What do you know about dating?” Liam eyes her and Zayn nods.

 

“She’s right you know,” Zayn grins. “We can do up supper and make it a proper night in.”

 

“I suppose,” Liam considers and tells Zayn to follow him into the kitchen. “What would you like to make? It looks like we’ve only got enough to fry up fish and chips, I really do need to go to the market.”

 

“Liam its fine, we’ll make do,” Zayn says with a hand on his shoulder and Taylor squeals from where she’s stood by the breakfast bar.

 

“Taylor,” Liam warns and she makes to leave.

 

“Sorry, I’m going!”

 

-

 

Louis rushes into the restaurant late. Not because she got held up or anything but because she sat in the car for ten minutes not wanting to look overeager. “Got to be fashionably late,” she says to herself as she reapplies her lipstick in the rearview mirror.

 

“Hi, I’m here for Styles, party of two,” she tells the maître d', fixing her dress and she walks up and smiles when she sees Harry already sat at a table. She walks, counts her steps and schools her face to not look as nervously concentrated as she feels.

 

“Louis,” he says when he looks up from his menu and she nearly melts. “I’m so glad you made it. You look stunning by the way.”

 

“Sorry I’m late,” she says as if she hadn’t been sitting outside twiddling her thumbs just two minutes ago. But that’s the thing you say in these types of situations, right?

 

“It’s no problem, I’ve just been looking over the menu here and apparently most of it is in French.” Harry makes a face at his menu just as a waitress comes and hands Louis her own.

 

“Lucky for you I took two years of French back in secondary,” Louis says and glances down at small text on her menu silently berating herself for forgetting to put in her contacts.

 

“I took German because my mum told me we come from a long line of ‘Germanic people’, turns out she just meant vikings or something,” Harry says.

 

“Really now? I’m  told that I am 1/16th German.” Louis puts down her menu, its a lost cause. “Also I’m no help to you here because I slept through class and I’ve not got my glasses.”

 

“You wear glasses? That’s really...” Harry hesitates, “sexy.”

 

“It’s not really, I started out wearing them for a laugh and messed up my own vision in the process. Now I’ve got to wear them to work everyday.”

 

Harry places his menu aside. “Where do you work?”

 

“I’m a musical theater teacher down at the local prep school although most of the time I feel like more like a student myself these kids are fantastic.”

 

“Ah so you’re a nurturer,” he says and Louis quirks an eyebrow.

 

“I suppose so what about you?”

 

“I’m quite boring, I’m a photographer. I studied music in Uni and choked on stage the day of my final performance. I quit after that, dropped out of school and bought my first camera online and now here I am.

 

“Oh, Liam works in music.” Louis cringes because really? She can’t spend an hour with Harry without bringing up Liam. “Well he and our friend Niall do, they work together, yes.”

 

“Right on,” he says as the waitress comes over to take their orders. “Well,” he picks up his menu. “I don’t understand a thing in here except for crepes and escargot.”

 

Louis giggles, oh god she _giggles._ “I’ve had beef bourguignon before, its quite tasty.”

 

“I’ll have whatever she’s having, thanks.” Harry says as Louis orders and then orders a bottle of wine.

 

“Not too much,” Louis tells the waitress when she comes back with two glasses and bottle of something red. “I’ve got to be up early and get the kids ready for school tomorrow.” she smiles politely.

 

“So, tell me about you children, if you don’t mind that is.”

 

“Oh no, I love talking about my kids. Well, Taylor, she’s the oldest, she’ll be sixteen soon. We had her right after we graduated from sixth form and she’s a terror. I suppose all teens are but she acts just as bad as I did back in school according to my mum, bless her.” Louis fumbles through her purse for the pictures she always keeps crumpled in there. “This is a bit old but that’s Taylor and this one is Paisley,” she points. “Liam will deny it ‘til his death but she’s his favorite. I know why though, she’s a spitting image of him even at twelve. Although if you asked me if I hadn’t birthed these kids I’d wonder if any of them were mine, they look nothing like me!”

 

“Ah well, I reckon they do,” Harry says looking up from the picture then down again. “Especially the little one here he’s got your smile.”

 

“Oh that’s my baby, Caleb. He’s nine now, but I still remember the day he was born just like it was yesterday. He’s strong willed like his father but so sensitive I just want to coddle him and keep him away from the world forever.”

 

“You’ve got a lovely family,” Harry tells Louis and as per usual she can’t control her mouth around him.

 

“I want you to meet them!” Louis realizes what she's said and backtracks. “I mean not tonight they ought to be in bed by then but you know next time or like eventually we can maybe-”

 

“I’d love to meet your kids.” Harry says as their food arrives and thanks their waitress. He puts his napkin in his lap and picks up his fork before adding, “Liam too.”

 

Louis chokes a bit on her food and pours herself another glass of wine this time twice as much as before. _‘I’m gonna need this_ ’ she tells herself in justification, clinks glasses with Harry when he holds his up for toast and downs her own glass immediately.

 

It’s cool whatever she’s met Zayn tons of times (twice, she's met Zayn _twice_ ) so she can introduce Liam and Harry, it’ll be a blast. Really. Bigger than a blast.

 

It’ll be an explosion.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey,” Zayn shimmies forward and slides a hand up around Liam’s neck. He thumbs at the nape of his neck like he already knows Liam so well and he melts into the touch. “Now I know two of your weaknesses.” Zayn smirks and presses harder until Liam lulls his head back and his eyes slip shut.

It’s not until after Liam's got the kids all cleaned and brushed and plucked and tucked into bed that he allows himself to flop on the sitting room couch next to Zayn who hands him a glass of wine from the bottle they found in the back of a cabinet along with a packet of sugar biscuits.

 

"Tonight was fun," Zayn says and takes a bite of a biscuit as Liam takes a healthy swig of wine.

 

He wonders if Louis’ night is going any smoother than his and hopes it is at least. He and Zayn had made supper for the pair of them with Zayn on chips duty while Liam handled the cod. That is until Paisley and Caleb came barreling down the stairs at the smell of food with Taylor, heart eyes and all, in tow.

 

"I'm pretty sure mum fed you lot before she left." Liam had said but lost all the fight he had in him once Zayn turned around and bat his incredibly long eyelashes  at him and insist that his children join them.

 

All five of them sat in the dining room, Liam at the head of the table with Zayn to his right. Taylor had pushed Caleb away to sit across from Zayn and force Liam watch her try to woo his potential boyfriend all night while his younger daughter fought with her little brother over the tube of catsup.

 

Yeah, fun night.

 

"Sorry about all of that." Liam sets his glass down and pulls his legs up between them. "About this night in general."

 

"Don't apologize," Zayn tells him. "I had fun. I'd like to hope that you had fun too...with me."

 

"No!" Liam shouts then blinks and backpedals. "I mean of course I did with you, yeah, it's just the kids and we were supposed to go out and it was kind of ruined?"

 

Zayn turns to him, pulls his legs up too so they’re all tangled and tucks his socked feet under Liam’s thighs. “Liam, I can honestly say tonight was one of the best nights I’ve had in a long time, our first date being the _best,_ of course.”

 

“But we were supposed to go out,” Liam frowns and drains the rest of his glass just so he doesn't have to look at Zayn. He shakes his head no when Zayn goes to top him off and grabs for the packet of biscuits instead but is too slow when Zayn pulls it away out of reach.

 

“Hey,” Zayn shimmies forward and slides a hand up around Liam’s neck. He thumbs at the nape of his neck like he already knows Liam so well and he melts into the touch. “Now I know two of your weaknesses.” Zayn smirks and presses harder until Liam lulls his head back and his eyes slip shut.

 

Liam feels like he may be asleep or possibly dead but, he’s breathing. He’s sure of it because he’s counting _inhale, exhale_ two every five seconds. But then Zayn’s kissing him, tentatively at first. Just pressing little butterfly kisses to the corner of his mouth, to the dip of his top lip, to the meat of his bottom lip and Liam pulls back.

 

"Zayn," he says but Zayn use his other hand to pull him in closer and shut him up. He licks into Liam's mouth and he tastes like wine and cinnamon and the sugar off those stupid biscuits and Liam surges forward.

 

He takes control of the kiss lets Zayn hold him there as he lays him back and presses him down into the couch. Zayn's slides a hand down the curve of his spine and into the back pocket of his trousers pulling them closer together. Liam ruts down, little swivels of his hips that he should be more careful about because he's bound to come undone at any time. What with Zayn kneading the meat of his arse and carding through his hair.

 

Liam bites at Zayn's bottom lip. He bites hard enough to know that it'll sting but is pleased to hear Zayn moan into the heat of his mouth and push up harder against him as Liam tongues over split of his lip appreciatively.

 

Shit he's close so so close and he can tell that Zayn is too. Liam had not imagined it would happen like this. Not tonight and not on his family sofa while his kids are seemingly asleep upstairs. He almost feels like this is wrong, like it shouldn't be happening because Taylor could be very well sat at the top of the steps listening or Paisley could stumble down stairs for a glass of milk or Caleb could have a night terror and come looking for him. But Liam is so incredibly hard that anything goes now. Absolutely nothing could stop him from getting off and getting Zayn off.

 

Except for maybe Louis.

 

"Christ!" She exclaims and Liam hasn't even heard her come in. He leaps away from Zayn in an instant, doesn't pull up though because he's still hard and the pressure of Zayn still rolling his hips up minutely has Liam's brain oozing from his ears.

 

"Louis," he says right as Zayn scratches lightly through the sensitive hairs at the back of his neck and Liam comes right there in his trousers.

 

"Could you not have waited?" Louis throws her coat up on the rack and stomps out of her heels. "Or at least taken this downstairs?"

 

"Sorry," Liam mumbles into the junction of Zayn's shoulder and tries to hold back a whimper when he feels Zayn still hard against his stomach.

 

"Where are my children?" She asks. "Were they looked after properly or did you two just have it out in here all night?"

 

"Bed." Liam pants and he hates that he's pretty much useless after he's come, already a breath away from conking out atop Zayn right then and there.

 

Louis rolls her eyes although he can't see it and climbs the steps. "Zayn," she calls out, "if you stay the night make sure to turn out all of the lights. He'll leave them on all night if you let him."

 

"Will do," Zayn shoots her a thumbs up with the hand that was sat on Liam’s head.

 

"Oh and I'm inviting Harry over for tea one night you should come.” Louis offers from top landing. “We’ll make it a proper meet and greet don't you think?"

 

Before Liam can answer she turns off the hall light and disappears. He groans and rolls over off Zayn into the slot between him and the pillows. Zayn turns to him with his arm trapped underneath Liam and places a hand on his back.

  
“Am I staying the night?” He asks, almost hesitantly and Liam nods.

 

“Of course.” He can see, can feel really, that Zayn is still hard and he wants him to stay yeah definitely. "I wanna suck you off."

 

“Brilliant,” Zayn grabs both of Liam’s hands and heaves him up eagerly flicking off the lights before pulling him down the steps.

 

They stumble down and Zayn falls back onto the bed. Liam climbs over him and works at the button of his jeans as he noses at the scruff on his neck. “Want you on my bed,” he says and moves down further, “want you in my mouth,” he pauses “want you here in the morning.”

 

“Liam,” Zayn grabs Liam’s face and pulls him back up to kiss once twice three times before pulling back. “I promise I’ll be here,” he says, “there’s no getting rid of me now.”

  
Liam lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and shoves a hand down the front of Zayn’s pants making him gasp. “Good, you’re not going anywhere. Now I’m going to make you come.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Taylor go get your father, tell him Zayn’s here.” Louis nudges her oldest daughter in the opposite direction of Zayn’s swoon worthy gaze. “Knock first!” She calls after her because there was that time Taylor walked in on her and Liam when she was younger back when Louis was pregnant with Caleb and horny _all the time_ and needless to say that was a disaster.

Louis’ seen more of Zayn than she’d like to have seen of him in the past week. But she doesn’t mind too much because he always helps with the washing up when he pops by for supper and he’s also gotten Liam better at not running up the energy bill, a feat even Louis couldn’t conquer after years of marriage.

 

Plus one night when Liam conked out on him in the middle of what Louis can only assume was heated snog (judging by the way he waddled up the steps and flopped down face first on the sofa next to her) they’d had a nice chat over a pint or two each. He even plaited her hair like they were having a proper primary sleepover but dutifully declined when Louis offered to paint his nails.

 

As suspected, Taylor has no qualms with him being around all the time. She’s made that undeniably clear in the way that she goes and gets herself done up quicker than any morning she’s got school whenever Liam announces that Zayn’s coming over. Paisley is a bit more quiet about it but Louis thinks she’s fallen suspect to his charm as well, _hell_ even Louis’ a bit charmed with the bloke and she’s got her own guy to fawn over. At least she’s got her baby, Caleb who still clings to her whenever he’s around and only ever answers yes or no questions in a very polite manner thank you very much.

 

“Mummy’s got a friend coming over tonight. You don’t mind do you?” Louis asks her son who is sat at the kitchen table supposedly doing homework, although Louis has an inkling of a suspicion that he’s doodling superheroes on scratch paper instead. He’s got his dad’s passion that’s for sure.

 

Caleb shrugs and doesn’t look up. “Dad’s always got Zayn over.”

 

“He does, doesn't he?” Louis pulls a chair out across from him and sits across from him. “Does that bother you, darling?”

 

“Nah, I like Zayn. He’s cool, even if he thinks Hulk is better than Thor.” Caleb puts down his pencil and looks up morosely. “He’s not mum, Hulk isn’t better than Thor. No one is.”

 

She grins and steals a grape off the snack plate she made him earlier. “Not even Batman?”

 

“Of course Batman,” Liam says and appears in the doorway behind her.

 

“Jesus Christ Liam!” Louis squeals. “What are you doing sneaking up on us?”

 

“I’m Batman,” he shrugs and snatches a grape off the plate before sitting down at the table with them. “I’m also Superman and Iron Man as well.”

 

“You can’t be all three dad.” Caleb says with too much exasperation to only be nine years old. “Plus mum is Iron Man.”

 

“What?” Liam squawks. “She can’t be Iron Man she’s not even a man!”

 

“I can be whatever I want thank you very much. If Caleb says I’m Iron Man then I’m Tony bloody Stark.” She plucks a stray grape that Liam goes to grab before he can get to it. “Antonia Edwaline Stark at your service, love.” Louis ruffles Caleb’s hair before turning her attention back to Liam. “Harry’s coming tonight.”

 

He nods. “Alright? So is Zayn.”

 

“Okay.” Louis stands. “I just wanted to make sure that you were aware since this’ll be the first time you meet him and all.”

 

Liam smirks. “Are you nervous?” He stands and follows her around the kitchen when she tries to deflect. “You’re nervous that’s so cute.”

 

“This coming from the guy who had a cry on me the night before his first date with Zayn.”

 

“Oh no. Don’t try to turn this on me, Lou. I’ve always been emotional. You on the other hand-”

 

“Shut it. Or I will very publically humiliate you in front of your only son. I’ll do it, I’ve got no problem with it.”

 

Taylor comes fuming into the kitchen with Paisley close behind. “Mum!” She exclaims. “Paisley’s got my blue scarf and won’t give it back. She’s purposely trying to sabotage me tonight because she knows Zayn’s coming over.”

 

“What is this? Why are you getting all worked up over Zayn coming over? He’s always over!” Liam exclaims just as Louis says, “Zayn is not your boyfriend or your manfriend, he’s not your mate and never will be.”

 

“No one ever wants to see me happy!” Taylor yells, voice shrill and high and both Caleb and Paisley slap their hands over their ears.

 

“Quiet down Taylor and ease up on the dramatics before I sign you up for after school theater whether you like it or not.” Louis crosses her arms and gets into what Liam calls ‘super parental mode’. “Paisley give your sister your scarf back and all three of you go get ready for supper.”

 

“Right,” Liam adds sternly, “and you Taylor get less,” he gestures vaguely at her, “all done up before Zayn and Harry get here.”

 

“But what if Harry’s fit as well? I can’t just walk around looking like crap!” Taylor wails. “Mum tell him.”

 

Louis shakes her head. “I’m sorry, but you know I’m with your father on this one. Save it for the school boys.”

 

“What?” Liam scoffs. “She’s not dating is she? Are you dating _boys_ Taylor?”

 

“Ugh! I hate my life nothing is fair!” Taylor stomps out of the kitchen.

 

“Life isn’t fair.” Caleb says and sticks his tongue out at his older sister. Paisley gives him a high five and they both follow her out up to their own rooms.

 

As expected Zayn shows up first and Louis practically trips over Taylor as they both run to get the door. “Oh, its only you.” Louis says and backs up to let him in and… “Niall? What are you doing here?”

 

“Uncle Niall!” Taylor exclaims and wraps her arms around him in a tight hug.

 

“I’m here to see my favorite niece of course,” he says and swings Taylor around.

 

“Hey!” Paisley is heard from the top of the steps as she and Caleb both run down the steps, much like Taylor and Louis just did, to get to Niall.

 

“I meant my favorite nieces and nephew.” Niall says with a kid on each leg.

 

“Hi Zayn,” Taylor pulls away and straightens herself. Louis has half a mind to muss up her hair to throw her off her game but that’d send her into a fit of rage that no one is prepared to deal with tonight.

 

“Vas sapnin’ Taylor?” Zayn grins and Louis can actually see the moment her brain turns to go and her heart swells.

 

“Taylor go get your father, tell him Zayn’s here.” Louis nudges her oldest daughter in the opposite direction of Zayn’s swoon worthy gaze. “Knock first!” She calls after her because there was that time Taylor walked in on her and Liam when she was younger back when Louis was pregnant with Caleb and horny _all the time_ and needless to say that was a disaster.

 

“So where’s the grub?” Niall asks and ah there’s the real reason why he’s here.

 

Louis rolls her eyes. “Liam got some funk stir fry thing going on. I told Harry to bring sushi.”

 

“Oh yes the infamous Harry! I finally get to meet ‘im. Where is he?”

 

“Obviously not here yet, now go, move away from the door take the children with you.” She tells him not that he had much of a choice with Paisley and Caleb clung to a leg each excitedly shouting things up at him at the same time.

 

Zayn follows them into the sitting room and Louis paces back and forth again and tries not to listen to when Liam comes up the steps and there’s a loud cheer and scattered chatter until the doorbell rings. She nearly jumps out of her skin as she smoothes out her shirt and checks her hair and makeup in the door side mirror.

 

She rushes forward and flings the door open to reveal Harry with a relaxed looking smile on his face. “Hellooooo,” he says and leans in forward to peck her on the lips before stepping in. “I’ve brought sushi, and also miso soup, aaaand wine. I hope you don’t mind.”

 

Of course she doesn’t mind, the more alcohol  the better. Maybe it’ll help calm her nerves about tonight. “Of course not!” Louis nearly shouts and pulls Harry in by the lapels of his coat for another kiss, this one slower, deeper and there’s a whistle behind them when she jerks away.

 

“You must be Harry!” Niall says and clambers forward to pull Harry into a hug. “I’m Niall, mate. Louis and Liam’s best friend don’t let her try and tell you otherwise.”

 

Harry does an impressive job of balancing everything on one hand as he’s instantly mobbed everyone currently in the house. “Hiiii,” he says to everyone who has gathered in the foyer when Niall lets him go. “I’m Harry.”

  
“Oh my God!” Taylor cries, hands thrown up in despair. “He’s so hot!”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You paint?” Harry asks Zayn.
> 
>  
> 
> “Among other things. Multimedia, I do a bit of everything. My specialty is street art though.”
> 
>  
> 
> “Like graffiti.” Louis tells Harry because she already knows all of this. Liam figures she must be as well versed in Zayn’s backstory as he is what with all the times they’ve sat and had a chat while Zayn was waiting for Liam to get home or the few times Liam embarrassingly fell asleep on Zayn.

Liam’s not sure why Louis was so apprehensive about him meeting Harry. He’s a nice guy. Niall takes to him immediately (and so does Taylor much to both Liam and Louis’ dismay) and if he can get Niall’s seal of approval so quick, then he’s sure Harry’s a good guy.

 

Good looking too. He’s got a dazzling smile and intense gaze that has Liam scrabbling back to touch Zayn every so often to make sure he’s not as enraptured as the rest of them are. He watches as Taylor tries to impress both Zayn and Harry with her lower level Spanish phrases that Niall answers to accordingly.

 

“Do you guys know any other languages?” She asks with her chin in her hands and arms propped up on the table the way Louis can’t stand.

 

Zayn shakes his head. “Nah,” and Liam knows that’s a lie because he’s caught him on the phone more than once murmuring things in a foreign language at all odd hours in the morning.

 

“I speak a bit of French and Spanish myself” Harry says. “I’m not as good as you though. It’s like you were brought up in Spain.”

 

Taylor flips her hair back and grins. “Well I wouldn’t say I’m _that_ good but you could teach me if you-”

 

“And that’s why you’ve got your great Uncle Niall here to help you,” Louis cuts in and stands up from her seat next to Harry. “I’ve got to grab a few extra plates from the kitchen, Taylor be a dear and help your mum?” She stages it as a question but Liam knows his oldest is about to get a proper chewing out from her mum and there’s no getting out of this one.

 

Taylor nods solemnly and follows Louis into the kitchen when surprisingly Caleb speaks up. “I’ve got a match tomorrow.” He says and Liam nods. “It’s our first this season and I’m scared,” he pushes around a few snow peas with his chopsticks, “what if we suck?”

 

“Nonsense, you’ll do fine, great actually.” Liam tells his son. He knows he’ll do well because Caleb is a natural and he’s not just saying that because he’s his father. All three of his kids have played football and ben exceptional at it. Liam sometimes wishes Taylor hadn’t given it up, but she claimed it wasn’t her calling and neither he or Louis weren’t going to force her to do anything she didn’t want to do.

 

“You play football?” Harry asks Caleb and he nods sheepishly. “I used to play a bit when I was younger. I was awful, but it was fun. That’s what it’s all about, innit? Getting out there and having a good time. As long as you’re enjoying yourself, you’ve automatically won I reckon.”

 

“That’s lovely, Harry,” Louis says, flouncing back in the room, unsurprisingly plate free, with a deflated looking Taylor trailing behind her. “I used to play when I was younger as well as Liam, he was actually captain for the better part of secondary and all throughout sixth form.”

 

Harry looks impressed. “Is that so?”

 

Liam nods. He’s not one to brag, he’s always had Louis to do that for him anyway, but he’ll admit he was pretty good. Probably could’ve gone and played professionally but couldn’t deal with being away so often, especially when he’d had a then pregnant wife at home.

 

“I used to play football,” Taylor mumbles underneath her breath. “I was brilliant, best on the team.”

 

“Why’d you give it up then?” Zayn asks and Paisley answers for her.

 

“Because she grew boobs and started to only care about boys.” She snickers.

 

Taylor’s eyes go wide and she looks like she’s about to revolt when Louis steps in. “Paisley!”

 

“She just grew out of it, is all.” Liam reassures her if anyone and pats Zayn’s arm affectionately. “She’s quite the artist, knows her way around a canvas and has been into crafts since she was young.”

 

His attempt to redeem his youngest must work because her bottom lip stops wobbling like she’s about to start wailing any second when Zayn speaks up.

 

“I’d love to have some of your stuff up at my gallery.” He tells her. “You can maybe swing by one day, take a look around.”

 

“I’d love to!” Taylor chirps.

 

“You paint?” Harry asks Zayn.

 

“Among other things. Multimedia, I do a bit of everything. My specialty is street art though.”

 

“Like graffiti.” Louis tells Harry because she already knows all of this. Liam figures she must be as well versed in Zayn’s backstory as he is what with all the times they’ve sat and had a chat while Zayn was waiting for Liam to get home or the few times Liam embarrassingly fell asleep on Zayn.

 

“Really? I’m a photographer, myself.” Harry perks up. “Maybe I could get some shots of your work one day.”

 

“Yeah, sure thing,” Zayn smiles back and Louis coos.

 

“Awe look at our boys.” She wraps an arm around Harry’s shoulders and pulls him in close. “Bonding and such.”

 

“What?” Caleb looks up at her, offended.

 

“She meant our boy _friends,_ ” Liam corrects her. “You’re still the top lad in my life, Caleb.”

 

He beams at Liam and then frowns. “Ok, but you still can’t be Iron Man.”

 

Liam lets out an undignified squawk. “Why not?”

 

“You can’t have it all babe,” Zayn tells him. “You win some you lose some.”

 

“Yeah well he’s always been a sore loser.” Louis says. “I’m Iron Man, by the way.”

 

“Oh can I be Superman?” Harry asks. “Pleeeease.”

 

“I’m Superman.” Liam says like its the most obvious thing ever because it is. “And Zayn is Batman.”

 

“I’m Thor.” Caleb speaks up.

 

“I wanna be Wonder Woman!” Paisley adds.

 

“What if I want to be Wonder Woman?” Taylor scoffs. “I’m older I get first choice.”

 

“Whatever,” Paisley says with a huge grin. “Guess I’ll just be Robin then.”

 

“Sweet I’ve got a Robin,” Zayn reaches across the table to high five Paisley.

 

She looks at Taylor like she planned this all along and Liam thinks, she probably did. He’s learned in the past never to underestimate any of his children. Especially Paisley.

 

“I guess I’ll be Captain America then.” Harry shrugs. “I mean, if he’s not taken already.” He looks at Niall who puts his hands up in surrender.

 

“I have no part in this! I’m just Niall.”

 

“No Uncle Niall! You have to play to even it out.” Caleb explains and Liam loves to see his son so passionate about something he loves. “They have four DC and we only have three Marvel.”

 

“Yes join us Niall,” Louis says, smile bright and sharky like she’s up to something.

 

Niall sighs between bites of stir fry. “Alright then Caleb you pick.”

 

“You should be-”

 

“Nope.” Taylor interrupts her little brother. “He has to pick it himself.”

 

“But mum didn’t pick hers!”

 

Taylor shrugs. “Sorry I don’t make the rules.”

 

“You totally just did though.” Liam mumbles and that earns him a dirty look from his oldest.

 

“To be fair I would’ve picked Iron Man anyway.” Louis says and pokes Niall. “Go on Niall, pick one.”

 

“Um, I reckon I’m the Hulk,” Niall nods, “because he’s green and strong and stuff.”

 

“What a compelling argument.” Zayn says but leans across to bump his fist anyway. “Sick choice bro.”

 

“Avengers versus the Justice League who would win?” Louis prods.

 

Liam rolls his eyes. “We’d totally kick all of your arses.”

 

“Oh daddy!” Paisley wails. “That’s five pence in the swear jar!”

 

“Ah fuck,” Liam kisses his teeth.

 

“That’s another five,” Taylor says.

 

Liam frowns. “Bollocks.”

 

“At this rate you ought to just put a pound in there right now.” Niall laughs.

 

“Shut it Niall James, we started this jar because of you.” Liam pouts.

 

It’s true they’d started the jar when Taylor was born to wean them all off swearing so much around the children and it worked… for a while.

 

Niall shakes his head. “No distractions Liam James, go on then.”

 

Liam moves to stand but Zayn grabs shoulder. “I’ll spot you babe,” he says and Louis groans.

 

“How fucking sweet is that.”

 

_“Mum!”_

 

“Damn…”

 

Niall cackles. “You lot are terrible. You’ll be poor before Taylor goes off to University, I swear.”

 

“Niall,” both Liam and Louis say in unison.

  
“Okay, okay. Don’t kill me mummy and daddy. I give up.” He turns to look at Harry. “Tough crowd.”


	9. Chapter 9

Louis is scurrying around the house so sure that she’s forgetting something but she can’t pinpoint what exactly it is.

 

“Mum!” Caleb runs into the kitchen, tears streaming down his face. “I’m not playing today. I don’t wanna go.” He plops down onto the floor by her feet and continues to cry into his hands.

 

She kneels down next to her son and brushes the wispy fringe off his forehead. “What? Darling, it’s your first match of the season. Why don’t you want to play?”

 

He sniffles a bit and blinks up at her, eyes wide and brown with his cheeks a splotchy and bottom lip wobbling precariously. “I just… I can’t. It’s stupid, mummy. I just don’t want to play.”

 

“Come on now.” Louis folds her legs criss-cross style and sits across from Caleb on the kitchen the floor which she notes could use a good washing down. “Tell your old mum what’s wrong so we can get you to this match on time. We are on snack duty you remember? I told are your mates we’d bring them sweets for a job well done.”

 

“Just drop it off then, I don’t wanna play.” He pouts and sucks in a sharp breath. “We’re just gonna lose anyway.”

 

Louis frowns. “Well, what makes you think that?”

 

“I suck, I’m not good at this at all and I can’t find my red socks so now I’m going to double suck and everyone will hate me.” Caleb looks up, his voice as watery as his eyes.

 

“Nonsense love, you’ll be excellent, I promise. We’ll get you a new pair of red socks for next week if you’d like to ease your troubles.”

 

“It’s not just any pair of socks mum, those were my lucky socks!”

 

“Okay, okay. I understand. Lucky for you, your father also had a pair of lucky socks when he was younger. I didn’t get it, but I’m glad I’ve kept them.” Louis stands and scoops Caleb up in her arms. She’s aware that he’s gotten much too old to be held like this but he’s her baby and she will do so until she can’t anymore. “Come on then let’s go get them. Are you alright with daddy’s lucky socks?”

 

“Will they make me play as good as dad?”

 

“Better than him I reckon,” Louis shrugs, “but don’t tell him I said that.” She carries a sniffling Caleb upstairs and sets him on her bed. Her cell phone rings from somewhere on her nightstand and she knew she was forgetting something. “Caleb sweetie, can you tell me who that is?”

 

“It’s dad,” he says and a second later, “hullo?”

 

She starts rummaging through boxes of Liam’s old things that she packed up and stuffed in the back of her closet when they first split. “Tell him we’re on our way we’re just running a little late. And ask him if he can go get snacks for the team since we won’t have time.”

 

“Daddy no-” he sounds like he’s about to burst into tears again as Louis emerges from the closet with a rushed ‘what’s happened?’. “He says he can’t make it to my game today.” Caleb cries. “I don’t wanna go we’re just gonna lose anyway!” He slams down the phone and hops of the bed before running out of the room.

 

Louis grabs the phone and continues digging through the box. “For fucks sake Liam its his first game. I’d just calmed him down enough to get him to go and now _this._ ”

 

“I’m sorry I got called into work,” Liam’s frown is evident in his voice. “I’ll be there, just later. I dropped Taylor and Paisley off already though and Mrs. Stevenson is keeping an eye on them for us until you get there.”

 

“He’s so nervous Li,” Louis says, deflated. “He needs you there. I’ve found your old lucky socks for him and everything. He’d very nearly had a strop over losing his own.”

 

“I’ll be quick I promise.” Liam says glumly and Louis doesn’t need to have two sad Payne’s on her hands.

 

“S’alright. I’ve got to go though. I need to call coach and tell him we can’t bring in any team goodies this week. Try and hurry though, bye.” She clicks off before he can reply and finds herself ringing Harry before she realizes what she’s doing.

 

“Hey,” Harry answers. “I’m almost at the park. Has the game started yet?”

 

“No not yet, we’re not even there ourselves.” She sighs. “Liam’s not going to be able to make it and Caleb refuses to leave the house. Today is turning into a disaster.”

 

Her phone beeps and its a text from Taylor. _‘where r u???? the game is starting soon!!!!!!!’_

 

“And on top of all that I’m in charge of team snacks this week, but by the time I get Caleb out of the house we won’t be able to stop for any.” Louis flops down face first onto her bed. “What am I going to dooooo?” she mumbles into her pillow.

 

“I’ll get the snacks for you.” Harry says and Louis sits up.

 

“You will?”

 

“Yeah of course, you just worry about Caleb and I’ll meet you there.” He says and Louis could cry.

 

“Are you serious?” She hops up with the socks his hand. “I love you so much.”

 

_WHAT?_

 

Louis hangs up and throws the phone like its hot.

  
What did she just do?

**Author's Note:**

> more to come soon!
> 
> show/tell me if you like it?


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